Tuesday, July 21, 2009

quick lesson in perspective

Yesterday we attended a get-together of sorts at a local splash park. I ended up running into an older friend I know through church. She's the mama to one of my mom-pals, and works at the post office near our Old House. Here's how the conversation went -

MamaTea: You know, W, I thought of you the other day. The tiger lilies are so lovely at my mom's house and I thought about when...
W: (finishing my sentence)...you and your boys used to walk up to the post office with bouquets of flowers for me from your garden. Oh, I miss that.
MT: Me too.
W: You know, I just love your boys. They are so full of energy.
MT: (thinking maybe its just one of those polite conversation things, so I roll my eyes in embarrassment.) Hmm. Is that right?
W: No, I'm serious. Your boys are so...special, MT. They aren't afraid to say what's on their mind.
MT: (really embarrassed)Um...yep, I guess.
W: I love it when you bring them to church and Pastor is doing the children's sermon...your boys are right there, telling him exactly what they think.
MT: And I'm usually in the pews, cringing.
W: (laughs) Aw...you know, sometimes the qualities in children that are most embarrassing to the parents are the most important ones for kids to have. You should be proud that you've got kids who can speak their mind and use that energy. That's a very important thing to be able to do.
MT: (now you've got me thinking...)I suppose you're right.
W: You know, my oldest granddaughter starts kindergarten this year.
MT: Is she excited?
W: Yes, she's really excited to go to school, but I'm a little nervous for her.
MT: How so?
W: Well, she's got lots of fire and energy and isn't afraid to say what she thinks.
MT: And?
W: I'm really afraid that public school will squash that right out of her.
MT: (big lightbulb) Ah.
W: Appreciate your kids' energy, MT.

And there you have it. Perspective. At a splash park. Sometimes my kids intensity drives me insane. But the alternative, having it possibly squashed into a little ball and trashed by someone else because intensity is inconvenient, just doesn't work for me.

Thanks for the reminder, W. The insanity isn't necessarily bad. Once again, its all about perspective :)


Stephanie said...

Yesterday I was watching Trev make friends with this man that was probably a few years older than me.
They talked for probably fifteen or twenty minutes.
They were way off on the pier, I could see Trev clearly, but not hear them.

I kept thinking how great it was that it was even happening. That Trev had no insecurities about boring someone, or his ability to converse and share with "just somebody".

Children's self-worth is so evident in such situations (as in yours) and it truly is something for a parent to be proud of for fostering, I think.
The alternative is usual, but no less tragic, you know?

topsytechie said...

Oh my soul...can't tell you how much I needed that post today. Positively providential!!

mamak said...

I feel so sad for those ball of fire, feisty little ones who lose it by first, second grade tops. what could have been?

Ruralmama said...

Thanks girlfriend, I needed that one too. Sometimes things are just so OVERWHELMING! Especially lately (read my blog post on Dysgraphia and you'll see why...sigh).


MamaLou said...

I get it. One of our best friends, hardcore military. Major. Loves our kids, thinks they are the "coolest".....makes you wonder eh?